Venting

I often think that things will just all fall apart, I feel that I am always setting myself up for disaster. It's a hard thing to describe because it's really all in my head. Especially when I don't have control of a situation, it frustrates me because I need stability and the only stability I've ever known is what I've created myself. So when these moments of no control happen I freak out that things aren't what I expected. I am somewhat high maintenance in that respect, because since I give every part of myself to something or somebody I feel I should get the same back. So when I don't, my life feels as though its gone to pieces. I feel unappreciated, but I shouldn't.
This is so difficult to write without sounding like someone did something horrible. Nothing bad has happened, its just the circumstances that frustrate me. I just want as much effort put into me as I put out. If I was to jump out on a limb for someone I would want them right there beside me. Does any of this make sense?
I'm just venting, I really am loved and appreciated most of the time, just these few moments of frailty shatter my dream. I guess I should get my head out of the clouds and look at the big real picture and quit exaggerating small inconveniences.